Phantos67: La tee doo da...
(A burst of light appears and Your Twin the Fourth appears with it... while wearing a disappointing look.)
Phantos67: Uh oh.
YTtF: I've waited for several weeks now! You just kind of left me back... wherever the last time we were was. Did you forget or something?!
Phantos67: Yup.
YTtF: Oh. Well, you want to do one now?
Phantos67: Yup.
YTtF: Okay, how about Swiggler?
Phantos67: Ok. To the past!!!
(Phantos67 uses telepathy to throw YTtF in his warp thingy and then Phantos follows... their first Interview... in the past!)
Phantos67: Ahh...
YTtF: Where are we?
Phantos67: We are in Toadwood Forest inside the Vim factory. We arrived before the Mario Bros. came to defeat Swiggler. So we have about... ten minutes.
YTtF: Oh, do we?
(The screen shows the Bros. frozen in an ice cube. A message is etched in the ice that says: "YTtF definitely didn't do this!")
Phantos67: 0_0
(They teleport inside Swiggler's room.)
Phantos67: 0_0
YTtF: Your face is going to freeze like that, you know.
Phantos67: 0_0
YTtF: Why do you keep doing that? Change your expression.
Phantos67: 0.0
YTtF: What's that supposed-
RAAAAAAAWR!!!
YTtF and Phantos67: 0.0
Swiggler: &^4$%^!!!
YTtF: It's... bigger than it looked in the game.
Phantos67: Translator.
He places translator a on the huge caterpillar.
Swiggler: ^^$#&$%*$$^#&%^*$%%!!!
YTtF: I THOUGHT YOU PLACED A TRANSLATOR!
Swiggler: No, actually I was swearing.
YTtF: Oh.
Phantos67: See? *sniff* Meanie.
Swiggler: So what do you want? Can we talk while I power up these UFOs?
Phantos67: Can you concentrate on THIS Interview?
Swiggler: Interview?!
YTtF: Yes. So, what are you?
Swiggler: I'm a Shroobified Wiggler! ... Modified into a Vim-producing machine.
Phantos67: So how do you power up the UFOs?
Swiggler: I drink this special drink made of the purple Mushrooms and this green stuff that I have no idea what it is. Then the Shroob doctors mix it all together, I drink it, it goes through my body through this little cord, and it sends that energy mixture to the UFOs.
Phantos67: Like gasoline into a car?
Swiggler: Yes.
Phantos67 But when you die...
Swiggler: I what?
Phantos67: Oh nothing.
YTtF: Why do the Dr. Shroobs always assist you?
Swiggler: Blackmail.
YTtF: Ok. So how-
Phantos67: Wait! Testify about the blackmail! Wait... You know what I mean!
Swiggler: I was joking, gosh. How do you two know all this stuff anyways?
(Phantos67 and YTtF glance at each other, then nod.)
Phantos67 and YTtF: We know all and we see all.
Swiggler: Creepy. Ok, the Dr. Shroobs are there so they can keep me alive if I ever get hurt by a UFO crash or some enemy. They are there to keep me as healthy as I can be.
Phantos67: Nice.
YTtF: What is Vim exactly?
Swiggler: It's the energy source of all living things. Once it's sucked away, people become shells of their former selves...
(This drawl goes on for several hours.)
Phantos67: OK, SHUT UP!! You’re beginning to sound like Morton!
Swiggler: Morton?
Phantos67: Never mind. How come ONE drink heals you, and another makes you sick?
Swiggler: If the Dr. Shroob puts the wrong mixture in the drink it can drain all my energy out for a short while and make me feel sick to my stomach.
Phantos67: Then... why would the Dr. Shroobs have a Mushroom that would make you sick?
Swiggler: Because it is used to make them smaller. They don't get affected by the sick feeling, at least not as much as I do.
YTtF: Why would Dr. Shroobs want to be smaller?
Swiggler: Hey, I'm not a Dr. Shroob, you know.
Phantos67: If you somehow die, then would the whole Vim factory be completely useless and be destroyed?
Swiggler: Unless they find another Swiggler that can do what I can. And that's impossible since there is only one me. Yes, it would be destroyed. I'm the only guy who can turn the Vim mixture into an energy the UFOs can receive.
YTtF: Wait... Then that means... YEAH!
(He throws a knife at Swiggler, who is killed but then randomly revived.)
Swiggler: Eep! At least wait until the Interview's over!
Phantos67: What are your HP and attacks?
Swiggler: My HP is 250. I can shoot little poisonous clouds, create shockwaves, and then power up UFOs to shoot blasts.
YTtF: What's your favorite Shroob? ... Answer Dr. Shroob, and be ready to suffer.
Swiggler: RC Shroober. They're cool an' snazzy, dog!
(A bucketful of buckets fall on top of him.)
Phantos67: Go easy on 'im. This is his last day to live, you know.
YTtF: Umm... Phantos...
Swiggler: What do you mean my last day to live?!
YTtF: It's against the rules to change the past!
Swiggler: What do you mean?!
Phantos67: AUDIENCE QUESTIONS!
(A group of Shroobs walk up.)
YTtF: ... We'll have a serious talk about this later, buster! Seat MUSTARDLYFURY!
Fawful: Will you be making an appearance in the awesome game of coolness, M&L3?
Swiggler: ... Not that I know of, no.
Phantos67: ... What are you doing in the Vim factory, Fawful?
Fawful: Well since Cackletta's death has brought me to a state of unemployment and misery, I'm touring the kingdom. I'm into Beans, might set up a shop somewhere.
Phantos67: That's nice. Seat LAKITU ON A UFO!
Lakitufo: Do you remember anything BEFORE you became Shroobified?
Swiggler: No. As I've been told, you forget your past when you become Shroobified.
YTtF: Seat... Wait, who IS this guy?!
Chocolate Bundt: I'm Chocolate Bundt, a character that will be making cameos on your show.
YTtF: ... You're not nice.
C. Bundt: Why do you have the antenna?
Swiggler: It attracts the UFOs to where I am when they're low on fuel.
Phantos67: How old do you live if you’re Shroobified?
Swiggler: Longer than usual. That's how they convince creatures to let them Shroobify them. You live at least 100 years longer if not more!
Phantos67: But you forget your past and are under their control.
Swiggler: That's the catch.
YTtF: Why-
C. Bundt: QUESTION SWIPE!
YTtF: OH NO YOU DON'T!
(He eats C. Bundt.)
C. Bundt: IT'S NO USE! I'LL ALWAYS BE AROUND!
YTtF: As long as we're rid of you for this Interview, we'll be fine. Why did they choose a Wiggler?
Swiggler: Wigglers are known for eating a... lot of stuff. And they're pretty good temper weapons.
Phantos67: Yeah, I've read "The Very Hungry Swiggler" book before. Haha! ... Get it?
(Everybody stares blankly.)
Shrooblet: Whenever you make a joke... nobody laughs... except... you.
Phantos67: ... Go die.
Shrooblet: Ok.
Phantos67: Ask a question first.
Shrooblet: You are one of the biggest Shroobs ever, right?
Swiggler: No. Yoob is by far the biggest. I am the second biggest.
Phantos67: What about Elder Princess Shroob's super form?
Swiggler: Who?!
YTtF: That hasn't happened yet, Phantos.
Phantos67: Oh.
YTtF: The time has come for TEH FINAL QUESTION!
Swiggler: Le sigh! I was enjoying this.
YTtF: Seat IAMSOMUCHBETTERTHANYOUWITHOUTMEYOU'DBENOTHING.
Dr. Shroob: What do you think of us?
Swiggler: I think you're worthless scum! I'd get rid of you if I could!
Phantos67: *sniff, sniff* That was so touching!
Mario: Luigi, come on! Baby Luigi, stop crying! Baby Mario, keep your back straight! Come on, some boss is in this room.
Phantos67: YTtF, come on! We gotta get outta here or else we'll mess up the past!
Swiggler: What?
Phantos67: Umm... There's a long line of UFOs to charge up. Better get to it. Hehe...
YTtF: There's something I want to do first... SUPERCARIFRAGILISTICESPIALIZAP!
(He turns Swiggler into a Mario Bros. magnet and electrifies the Bros. You can probably guess what's gonna happen now.)
Phantos67: So much for not messing up time.
Mario: Just-a who do you think-a you are?!
Swiggler: I'm Swiggler, you idiot!
(Baby Mario knocks Swiggler's cup over and things continue just like they did in the game.)
YTtF: Pass the popcorn, will ya, Phantos?
Phantos67: Here.
Swiggler: You guys could help me, ya know!
Phantos67: We're just going to watch off-screen.
(YTtF warps Phantos and himself back to the present time.)
Phantos67: We didn't even see Swiggler die! What was that for?!
YTtF: We're keeping this Interview PG.
Phantos67: Well I like the R-rated Interviews better! Hmmph.
C. Bundt: Can you call THIS PG?!
(He is thrown up from YTtF's body, along with a lot of... stuff.)
Phantos67: Scratch that... G is much better. Bleh...
C. Bundt: END TRANSMISSION!
YTtF: ... I'm gonna getcha, very very soon...
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